Just a little Bellycaking about work….

Remember when I said work was nuts but looking to calm down?  I totally and completely lied. Cancer studies are overwhelming in startup.  I mean OVERWHELMING.  But it’s all for a good cause right?  I mean curing cancer?  Except that in my personal opinion, knowing how cancer operates, we’ll never have a cure.  We’ll get exceptionally good at preventing and treating it but you can’t halt cellular decay without well, stopping death.  Pretty sure that Torchwood’s Miracle Day miniseries proved a world without death is frakking scary.  But back to business….

It’s hard for me to explain what it is I do to people.  I’m not actually in lab developing drugs and I’m not actually a doctor on site treating patients.  I work managing these studies so a lot of my job involves running around helping to put out fires on a daily basis.  As a result I’ve become one of those people.  You know: attached to her phone, always checking email, unable to relax because at any given moment there might be some catastrophic error that makes management cranky when a multi-million, sometimes billion dollar, investment is in danger of making a major violation with the FDA that could shut it down.

One of the challenges I find myself facing is how to express to people why I feel the need to work so hard without sounding, well, condescending.  **Disclaimer: I have had a discussion about this with multiple people.  Please do not think this post is in anyway linked to you, dear reader, specifically.  I’m not addressing an individual passively via my blog.  I’m just rambling in light of MANY people I’ve had these kinds of talks with.  Oftentimes multiple people in day.  So I figured it made sense to write about**  I don’t think I’m special or more important; my job just requires a certain level of dedication.  It can be challenging to find a way to explain this without sounding like a bitch.  When I hear “Why are you working on a weekend?” – the answer quite simply is “I have to.”  True I can’t get fired for NOT responding to emails but I also can’t do my job properly if I don’t. Okay so if someone sends me an email asking to compile a spreadsheet that isn’t needed for a week, obviously that can wait.  But if I get a notification for example that a biological sample was shipped to a lab on a Friday—that could require immediate attention.  Why?  Well if a sample that requires refrigeration goes out Friday to a lab that is closed Saturday it won’t get put in proper storage until Monday and by then might no longer be viable.  When you are talking about bone marrow samples it’s not like this is something you can just redo.  So yeah I’ll drop what I’m doing and follow up.

I know I don’t have the only job that requires this kind of “on the clock – round the clock” attention.  I’ve got a few friends in the IT world who will, assuming they aren’t on a vacation thousands of miles away, have to run in on a weekend because a server goes down.  Sadly in this day and age of technological connectivity there really is no way to ever be completely unreachable unless you have a plan to be.  Like for Comic Con.  I’ll have backups for my backups while I’m out of the office to ensure that nothing goes wrong.  NOTHING and NO ONE stops the Con*Dear Universe: I realize there are always exceptions for the rule.  Please don’t try to punish me for making this statement.*

But that’s not to say that there’s no accounting for real life.  I just returned from my first ever work trip to DC.  My company was hosting a conference for our North American sites on the study.  (I feel all grown up and snazzy.)  Sadly I had to cut the trip short because I got a phone call during dinner that my Step-Dad and stepbrother were in a car accident.  They are fine but I flew back home right away to be with my family.  In order to thank my team for being supportive, and especially the lead on that conference who did her best to help me in spite of having a million things to do, I baked a cake.

We’d had a discussion in the past that this colleague’s favorite dessert is tiramisu.  *Groan* I hate tiramisu.  Well okay don’t hate, I just haven’t ever had a good one.  I’ve always found this dish to be cloyingly sweet or drowned in enough rum to make Jack Sparrow say “Enough.”   Plus lady fingers are so boring. Still, baked goods are love and I decided to confront this confection and make it delicious.  So I did what I always do when exploring new territory: I turned to Dorie Greenspan.  Sure enough there was a recipe for a Tiramisu inspired cake that looked promising.  I mean in theory the dessert sounds great to me.  Chocolate, rum and espresso?  So I figured this would be a good place to start.

AND OH MY GOD IT WAS.  Even if you are like me and “meh” on the tira-bandwagon, make this cake and you’ll finally get it.  I’m not sure I still like the classic version but I’ll make this cake anytime someone asks.  Then I’ll make a second one just for me.

Tiramisu Cake

Baking: From My Home to Yours by Dorie Greenspan

For the cake layers:

• 2 cups cake flour
• 2 tsps baking powder
• 1/8 tsp baking soda
• 1/4 tsp salt
• 1 1/4 sticks unsalted butter, room temperature
• 1 cup sugar
• 3 large eggs
• 1 large egg yolk
• 1 1/2 tsps pure vanilla extract
• 3/4 cup buttermilk

For the espresso extract:

• 2 Tbsps instant espresso powder
• 2 Tbsps boiling water

For the espresso syrup:

• 1/2 cup water
• 1/3 cup sugar
• 1 Tbsp Kahlua (or brandy/amaretto)

For the filling and frosting:

• 1 8-ounce container mascarpone
• 1/2 cup confectioners’ sugar, sifted
• 1 1/2 tsps pure vanilla extract
• 1 Tbsp Kahlua (or brandy/amaretto)
• 1 cup cold heavy cream
• 2 1/2 ounces bittersweet or semisweet chocolate, finely chopped, or about 1/2 cup store-bought mini chocolate chips

• Chocolate-covered espresso beans, for decoration (optional)

Getting ready:

Center a rack in the oven and preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Butter two 9×2 inch round cake pans, dust the insides with flour, tap out the excess, and line the bottoms of the pans with parchment or wax paper. Put the pans on a baking sheet.

To make the cake:

Sift together the cake flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt.

Working with a stand mixer, preferably fitted with a paddle attachment, or with a hand mixer in a large bowl, beat the butter on medium speed until soft and creamy. Add the sugar and beat for another 3 minutes. Add the eggs one by one, and then the yolk, beating for 1 minute after each addition. Beat in the vanilla; don’t be concerned if the mixture looks curdled. Reduce the mixer speed to low and add the dry ingredients alternately with the buttermilk, adding the dry ingredients in 3 additions and the milk in 2 (begin and end with the dry ingredients); scrape down the sides of the bowl as needed and mix only until the ingredients disappear into the batter. Divide the batter evenly between the two pans and smooth the tops with a rubber spatula.

Bake for 28 to 30 minutes, rotating the pans at the midway point. When fully baked, the cakes will be golden and springy to the touch and a thin knife inserted into the centers will come out clean. Transfer the cakes to a rack and cool for about 5 minutes, then run a knife around the sides of the cakes, unmold them, and peel off the paper liners. Invert and cool to room temperature right-side up.

To make the extract:

Stir the espresso powder and boiling water together in a small cup until blended. Set aside.

To make the syrup:

Stir the water and sugar together in a small saucepan and bring just to a boil. Pour the syrup into a small heatproof bowl and stir in 1 Tbsp of the espresso extract and the liqueur or brandy; set aside.

To make the filling and frosting:

Put the mascarpone, sugar, vanilla, and liqueur in a large bowl and whisk just until blended and smooth.

Working with the stand mixer with the whisk attachment or with a hand mixer, whip the heavy cream until it holds firm peaks. Switch to a rubber spatula and stir about one quarter of the whipped cream into the mascarpone. Fold in the rest of the whipped cream with a light touch.

To assemble the cake:

If the tops of the cake layers have crowned, use a long serrated knife and a gentle sawing motion to even them. Place one layer right-side up on a cardboard round or a cake plate protected with strips of wax or parchment paper. Using a pastry brush or a small spoon, soak the layer with about one third of the espresso syrup. Smooth some of the mascarpone cream over the layer – user about 1 1/4 cups – and gently press the chopped chocolate into the filling. Put the second cake layer on the counter and soak the top of it with half the remaining espresso syrup, then turn the layer over and position it, soaked side down, over the filling. Soak the top of the cake with the remaining syrup.

For the frosting, whisk 1 to 1 1/2 Tbsps of the remaining espresso extract into the remaining mascarpone filling. Taste the frosting as you go to decide how much extract you want to add. If the frosting looks as if it might be a little too soft to spread over the cake, press a piece of plastic wrap against its surface and refrigerate it for 15 minutes or so. Refrigerate the cake too.

With a long metal icing spatula, smooth the frosting around the sides of the cake and over the top. If you want to decorate the cake with chocolate-covered espresso beans, press them into the filling, making concentric circles of beans or just putting some beans in the center of the cake.

Refrigerate the cake for at least 3 hours (or for up to 1 day) before serving – the elements need time to meld.